Teacher: Where does God live?
老师:上帝住在哪儿?
Student: I think he lives in our bathroom.
学生:我想他应该住在我家浴室。
Teacher: Why do you say that?
老师:为什么这么说?
Student: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, "God, are you still in there?"
学生:因为每天早上我爸爸都猛敲浴室的大门喊:“上帝啊,你怎么还在里面?”
Teacher: How can you tell a hawk has good eyesight?
老师:你能告诉我为什么鹰的视力很好吗?
Student: Because I have never seen a hawk wearing spectacles.
学生:因为我从没见过哪只鹰戴眼镜。
Teacher: Tom and John! Why are you late for school today?
老师:汤姆!约翰!你俩今天为什么迟到!
Tom: Madam, I lost a one-dollar coin and was searching for it.
汤姆:老师,我掉了一美元硬币,我在找它。
Teachear: John, what about you?
老师:那么你呢,约翰?
John: Madam, I was not able to move beacause I was hiding that coin under my feet.
约翰:老师,我不能动啊,因为我把他的硬币藏在脚底下了。
Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
老师:你父亲有没有跟你一起做作业?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
学生:没有,他是独立完成的。
Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
老师:西印度群岛都出产些什么?
Student: I don''t know.
学生:我不晓得。
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
老师:怎么会不知道,你每天吃的糖哪儿来的?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.
学生:邻居家借的。
Teacher: This is the fifth time this week that I have had punished you. What do you want to say?
老师:这已经是我本周第五次罚你了。想说点什么?
Student: Thank god Saturday and Sunday are holidays, Sir!
学生:还好礼拜六礼拜天不上课啊老师!
Teacher: Jimmy, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother''s. Did you copy his?
老师:吉米,你那篇关于“我的小狗”的文章和你哥哥写的完全一样。你是不是抄你哥的?
Jimmy: No, teacher, it''s the same dog!
吉米:老师,我没有抄袭。那是因为我们写的是同一条狗!
Teacher: You missed school yesterday, didn''t you?
Student: Not very much!
*这则就不翻译啦,翻译出来的话说不通。miss既有“错过”的意思,也有“想念”的意思。老师问的是“你昨天没来学校不是吗?”,而学生理解成了“你昨天很想念学校不是吗?”,因此回答“不太想!”
Tom: Great news, teacher says we have a test today come rain or shine.
汤姆:好消息,老师说今天无论下雨还是天晴我们都要考试。
John: So what''s great about that?
约翰:那有什么好高兴的?
Tom: It''s snowing outside!
汤姆:因为现在外面在下雪!
*come rain or shine是指“不管发生什么情况”,相当于我们所说的“风雨无阻”。而汤姆以为是指下雨和天晴两种情况下需要考试。
Teacher: How can you make so many mistakes in just one day?
老师:为什么你一天里能做错那么多事!
Pupil: I get up early!
学生:谁让我起得早呢!