【感恩教师节】笑话集锦:我和老师的故事

2012-09-05 08:00:00 来源:网络 作者:PMC_ivy
笑话集锦:我和老师的故事

Teacher: Where does God live?


老师:上帝住在哪儿?


Student: I think he lives in our bathroom.


学生:我想他应该住在我家浴室。


Teacher: Why do you say that?


老师:为什么这么说?


Student: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, "God, are you still in there?"


学生:因为每天早上我爸爸都猛敲浴室的大门喊:“上帝啊,你怎么还在里面?”


Teacher: How can you tell a hawk has good eyesight?


老师:你能告诉我为什么鹰的视力很好吗?


Student: Because I have never seen a hawk wearing spectacles.


学生:因为我从没见过哪只鹰戴眼镜。


Teacher: Tom and John! Why are you late for school today?


老师:汤姆!约翰!你俩今天为什么迟到!


Tom: Madam, I lost a one-dollar coin and was searching for it.


汤姆:老师,我掉了一美元硬币,我在找它。


Teachear: John, what about you?


老师:那么你呢,约翰?


John: Madam, I was not able to move beacause I was hiding that coin under my feet.


约翰:老师,我不能动啊,因为我把他的硬币藏在脚底下了。


Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?


老师:你父亲有没有跟你一起做作业?


Student: No, he did it all by himself.


学生:没有,他是独立完成的。


Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?


老师:西印度群岛都出产些什么?


Student: I don''t know.


学生:我不晓得。


Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?


老师:怎么会不知道,你每天吃的糖哪儿来的?


Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.


学生:邻居家借的。


Teacher: This is the fifth time this week that I have had punished you. What do you want to say?


老师:这已经是我本周第五次罚你了。想说点什么?


Student: Thank god Saturday and Sunday are holidays, Sir!


学生:还好礼拜六礼拜天不上课啊老师!


Teacher: Jimmy, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother''s. Did you copy his?


老师:吉米,你那篇关于“我的小狗”的文章和你哥哥写的完全一样。你是不是抄你哥的?


Jimmy: No, teacher, it''s the same dog!


吉米:老师,我没有抄袭。那是因为我们写的是同一条狗!

Teacher: You missed school yesterday, didn''t you?

Student: Not very much!

*这则就不翻译啦,翻译出来的话说不通。miss既有“错过”的意思,也有“想念”的意思。老师问的是“你昨天没来学校不是吗?”,而学生理解成了“你昨天很想念学校不是吗?”,因此回答“不太想!”


Tom: Great news, teacher says we have a test today come rain or shine.


汤姆:好消息,老师说今天无论下雨还是天晴我们都要考试。


John: So what''s great about that?


约翰:那有什么好高兴的?


Tom: It''s snowing outside!


汤姆:因为现在外面在下雪!

*come rain or shine是指“不管发生什么情况”,相当于我们所说的“风雨无阻”。而汤姆以为是指下雨和天晴两种情况下需要考试。


Teacher: How can you make so many mistakes in just one day?


老师:为什么你一天里能做错那么多事!


Pupil: I get up early!


学生:谁让我起得早呢!


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